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In Washington, specifically for not-for-hire vehicles, you would be fined for going over your registered capacity (RCW 46.16A.540). That's defined as the weight listed on your registration. The fine is that you must register your vehicle for the new weight and your first offense is $25-$50. (RCW 46.16A.545).
Vehicles exceeding 6000 lbs must be licensed for at least 150% of their empty weight but must also be licensed for the max load they will carry. You register it in 2000 lb increments. You don't have to include the trailer weight if it's for personal use (RCW 46.16A.455). You can increase your registered GVWR. It makes no mention of manufacturer's GVWR.
In conclusion, for private vehicles in Washington, if you do get stopped and weighed, it's a slap on the wrist and probably not worth the officer's time unless it's visibly grossly unsafe. I make absolutely no claim as to whether that's a good idea or not. People's feelings on this topic are strong. I am also not a lawyer. You can look up the laws I've cited for yourself.
Realistically, the only checks of private vehicles I've ever seen at the weigh station where I live are for invasive species on boats. They aren't likely to stop a 2500 pulling a 5th wheel.
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