Want kids?

[ARJ]

GOD CREATED CHILDREN (AND IN THE PROCESS GRANDCHILDREN)

To those of us who have children in our lives, whether they are our own, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, or students... here is something to make you chuckle.

Whenever your children are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that
even God's omnipotence did not extend to His own children.

After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve

And the first thing he said was ' DON'T !'

'Don 't what ? ' Adam replied.

'Don't eat the forbidden fruit.' God said.

'Forbidden fruit ? We have forbidden fruit ? Hey Eve..we have forbidden fruit ! '

' No Way ! '
'Yes way !'

'Do NOT eat the fruit ! ' said God.

'Why ? '

'Because I am your Father and I said so! ' God replied, wondering why He hadn't stopped creation after making the elephants

A few minutes later,
God saw His children having an apple break and He was ticked !
'Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit ? ' God asked.

'Uh huh,' Adam replied.

'Then why did you ? ' said the Father.

'I don't know,' said Eve.
'She started it! ' Adam said.

'Did not ;! '
'Did too ! '
'DID NOT ! '

Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that Adam and Eve should have children of their own.
Thus the pattern was set and it has never changed.

THINGS TO THINK ABOUT !

1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk and talk Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up.

2. Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your own children.

3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young.

4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said

5. The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own

6. We childproofed our homes, but they are still getting in.

ADVICE FOR THE DAY:

Be nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing home one day

AND FINALLY:

IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION AND YOU GET A HEADACHE,
DO WHAT IT SAYS ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE:

'TAKE TWO ASPIRIN'
AND 'KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN'!!!!!

[Champ_49]

Now that right there was funny, don't care who you are

[helmick]

I like it.

[PapaBeav]

Amen

[countrylady]

That was too absolutely funny...made me laugh out loud! Lord knows, I love my children to death and am thankful for them AND five grandchildren...but I can relate to alot of what was said and it's still funny! God has such a sense of humor, doesn't He?

Thanks for sharing

[Dustytuu]

Very funny! I can relate to this!
Have one kid and he can't seem to stay married long enough to have any grandkids for me. :0

[DonandBonnie]

Yup, we can relate. There was a time that our son was 8 years old going on 30. Then he got a little older and turned 18 going on 3.